Damon's Samples (of Writing)

A while back some friends of mine and I (Ms Maizun, the famous G from the Ms Maizun blogs and the incomparably Polygyros and with the help of the so lovely and talented I had to marry her Missus Sour) recorded one episode of what was to be a Podcast series called Nemoscene. We never really got around to finishing the others. Below is episode two. I've written four or five episodes and the scripts of those will appear here from time to time. If you're interested in episode one please use the link to the side their called Nemoscene. Since this was written to be an audio adventure to really capture the flavour of it try reading it with your eyes closed.


INT. HALLWAY. MOMENTS LATER

SOUND of Nem and Cass materializing.

NEM
What the hell was that?

CASS
I wasn't entirely sure I could pull
that off. Pretty good, don't you
think?

NEM
What the hell just happened?

CASS
Haven't you ever "sent" before?

NEM
What kind of ridiculous world have
I woken up in?

CASS
Where are you from anyway? The
stone age?

SOUNDS of apartment life. Fluorescent lights buzzing.

NEM
How did you do that?

CASS
The actually scientific
machinations will just give you a
headache and quite frankly we don't
have all day. We materialized only
a few blocks away from the bar.

NEM
A teleporting cell phone. A
talking, teleporting cell phone.
This is a dream. No, scratch that,
a god damned nightmare.

CASS
Well we know one thing about you?

NEM
What's that?

CASS
You've got a potty mouth on you.

NEM
So where are we?

CASS
That door there, in front of you,
is the apartment of one Derek
Phelps.

NEM
Who's he?

CASS
Someone in your address book.

NEM
Do I know him?

CASS
Apparently.

NEM
He might be a friend of mine?

CASS
Perhaps.

NEM
Or an enemy? Do people keep their
enemies names in their cell phones?

CASS
We really don't have time for-

NEM
Maybe he was a friend then we had a
fight or something and now we hate
each other ...

CASS
Maybe he's an ex-boyfriend?

NEM
Am I...

Pause

NEM
Why aren't you anything?

CASS
Well there's only one way to find
out, isn't there?

NEM
Knock, knock.

CASS
That's right
(sighs)
Form your hand into a fist like
shape, turn your knuckles toward
the door-

SOUND of buttons being pushed.

CASS
What are you doing?

NEM
Volume. Brightness. Where's the
sarcasm button?

CASS
Very funny.

NEM
Hey. We know something else about
me? I've got a sense of humour.

CASS
You're hilarious. Now knockie,
knockie.

SOUND of knuckle on door.

Pause

NEM
Maybe he's out.

CASS
OK. MAybe we should try another
address.

NEM
I'll try again.

SOund of knocking.

Pause.

Sound of movement behind the door. Furniture being moved.

DEREK
Who is it?

Pause.

NEM
What do I say?

CASS
Tell him your the pizza guy.

NEM
Pizza guy?

CASS
Just do it.

NEM
(clears his throat,
speaking gruffly)
Pizza guy.

CASS
What's with the voice?

NEM
I dunno ...

DEREK
Pizza!

Pause

DEREK
It's about god damned time.

Sound of several locks being undone.

Sound of door opening.

DEREK
I've been waiting -

Pause

DEREK
(screams)
Ahh!

Sound of door slamming.

CASS
He didn't seem to glad to see you,
did he?

Sound of furniture being pushed over, running.

NEM
What's he doing?

CASS
One sec.

Electronic cell phone sound.

CASS
I believe he's fleeing out his
bathroom window.

NEM
From me? Why?

CASS
Let's find out, shall we?



INT. SIXX ENTERPRISES OFFICES. SAME TIME

Phone rings.

FEMALE VOICE
Good evening, Sixx Enterprises.
(pause)
One moment please.

Two beeps.



INT. SIXX ENTERPRISES MEETING ROOM. SAME TIME

Sounds of meeting, people talking, etc.

SIXX
Gentleman. Settle down. Fourth
quarter earnings will meet the
target. The project is ahead of
schedule. The media department is
ready to go. We've just got one
thing last thing to take care of.

FEMALE VOICE
Sir?

SIXX
Yes?

FEMALE VOICE
Call for you sir. Red line.

SIXX
Thank you. Gentlemen. If you'll
excuse me.

Sound of door closing. Phone being picked up.

SIXX
Yes.
(pause)
Escaped? ...The police beat you
there? Someone must have tipped
them off.
(pause)
I don't need to impress upon you
the ...
(pause)
I need him dead by the close of the
markets tomorrow. You cam highly
recommended with a price tag to
match. Do the job.

Sound of phone being clicked off.

SIXX
By the close of the markets
tomorrow he will be dead. And I'll
be the richest, most powerful man
in the empire. I wont sleep
tonight.



EXT. ALLEYWAY. LATER.

Sound of boots on metal fire escape. In the distance the
sound of the city. Sound of boots landing on cement.

DEREK
Oh god, oh god, oh god.

NEM
Hey, stop. I just want to talk.

DEREK
AH!

Sound of running.

Sound of a chase.

NEM
He really doesn't want to talk to
me.

CASS
Maybe you really broke his heart?

Sound of chase continues. Crash of garbage cans.

NEM
Is there anything you can do to
slow him down?

CASS
Why don't you throw me at him. Hey
I was kidding.

NEM
Almost ... got ... You

Sound of two bodies tumbling to the ground. Crash of garbage
cans. Heavy breathing.

DEREK
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god.

NEM
Why did you run?

DEREK
I swear I didn't rat you out man.
It wasn't me. Oh go please don't
kill me.

NEM
Why did you run? Who am I?

DEREK
Oh please. Oh please. They said
they's square it all with Ricco
man. What could I do?

NEM
Just shut up and tell me-

DEREK
Ricco was gonna have my balls man.
And that's not an expression.

NEM
Please stop talking and just answer
my-

DEREK
Don't kil me.

Sound of fist hitting face.

CASS
Why did you do that?

DEREK
Why did you do that?

NEM
Why did I do that?

Sound of fist hitting face again.

CASS
You did it again?

DEREK
Stop hitting me, man.

NEM
Why did I do that?

DEREK
If you're gonna do it just finish
me off.

NEM
Do what? Look, do you know me?

DEREK
What's wrong with you?

NEM
I said, do you know me?

DEREK
Don't hit me again.

NEM
I wont. Just tell me. Who am I?

Music.



INT. DEREK'S APARTMENT. LATER.

Sound of bottles being opened. Glasses being moved.

CASS
Lovely decor.

DEREK
What did she say?

NEM
She likes what you've done with the
place.

DEREK
She was always a bitch.

CASS
Jealous much.

DEREK
My cell phone doesn't talk. Too
expensive. Just give me a bloody
headache anyway.

CASS
Maybe it does talk but it assumes
there wouldn't be any intelligent
conversation to be had so it keeps
it's mouth shut.

DEREK
Why don't you keep your mouth shut.
Here.

NEM
Thank you.
(sips)
So ... are we friends?

DEREK
Do you normally punch your friends
in the face?

NEM
Why did you run from me?

DEREK
I figured you where here for
payback. Because I - because you
thought I grassed you out to the
cops.

CASS
Did you?

NEM
You mean because of the girl?

DEREK
You hired me to find the girl for
you.

NEM
How did we know each other?

DEREK
We didn't. Rocco recommend me to
you. I'm the best.

NEM
At what?

DEREK
Finding people. It's pretty easy,
really. We're all connected through
the system.

NEM
So this girl was lost?

DEREK
Or hiding.

NEM
From me?

DEREK
You didn't tell me much. Just told
me to find her. It's wasn't easy,
either.

CASS
Did we pay you?

DEREK
Do I look like I'm running a
charity here?

CASS
What's your connection to Rocco?

NEM
Who's Rocco?

CASS
According to public record he's
either a kid from the wrong side of
the tracks done good or the head of
the criminal underclass.

DEREK
I owed Rocco for a few bets I
placed. But even with the money you
gave me I still couldn't ...

CASS
So he told the police where to find
you.

NEM
When did this all happen?

DEREK
You were here yesterday. You gave
me the money but I never told the
police -

CASS
They didn't seem to have much
problem finding us.

DEREK
You weren't exactly subtle.
Strutting around like you were
untouchable. Now look at you?

NEM
What does that mean?

DEREK
You big man. You came in here,
treating me like I was a cockroach.
A cockroach you needed help from
but still a cockroach.

NEM
Who am I?

DEREK
Some people, people who want to
,can disappear. If they're rich
enough. And she was. You were
obsessed with her. The way you
spoke to me. Such a big man. What's
your name, eh? You can't even
remember you're name.

NEM
Just take it easy.

DEREK
I gotta wizz.

Sound of footsteps leaving the room.

CASS
I don't trust him.

NEM
Who am I? Who am I that I could
know someone like this?

Sound of toilet flushing.

DEREK
(sounds like he's in
another room)
Can't quite figure out how you
could be in he company of someone
like me?

NEM
Look, I'm sorry. I don't know ...
I'm sorry if I've hurt you.

DEREK
And now you sit there thinking
you're better than me?

NEM
No. I just ... I need help.

DEREK
And now you're here looking for my
help. After the way you treated me?
After what you did to me?

NEM
I'm sorry. I can't remember a
thing.

DEREK
You want to know who you are?

Sound of Derek entering the room.

DEREK
This is who you are.

Sound of clothing being removed.

NEM
You're chest ... it's all ...

DEREK
Nasty, isn't it? Now what sort of
person do you figure could do
something like that to another
human being?

NEM
Please... I can't remember a thing.
Just tell me. My name. What's my
name?

DEREK
You're name? You're a god damned
monster. This is what you did when
I couldn't find her. The first
time. She certainly didn't want to
be found. And I can see why.

CASS
Nem?

NEM
What's my name? Tell me my name?

DEREK
Are you sure you still want to
know.

CASS
Nem. Nem we have to go.

DEREK
I may not be one of Moonbase Four's
more unstanding citizens. But I
don't scar people for life. And I
sure as hell never murdered anyone.

NEM
I didn't kill that girl?

DEREK
Who are you kidding? You probably
enjoyed it. I'll tell you your name
know, if you still want to know?

CASS
Nem. He's called the police. We
have to go.

NEM
Yes. Tell me?

DEREK
After all the things I've told you?
You still want to know?

CASS
Nem!

DEREK
Yeah. I can still see it in your
eyes.

NEM
Tell me. Tell me you little
cockroach. You're enjoying this.

CASS
Nem. The police have entered the
building.

DEREK
I sure am. You're going to fry.

NEM
TEll me!

Door crashes in. Police yelling.

DEREK
There he is, officers. There's the
big man.

NEM
Tell me!

CASS
Pick em up, dial.

Sound of feet rushing into the room. Furniture being smashed
and thrown about.

NEM
Tell me!

DEREK
Bye bye Mr. -

Gunshots. Sound of body falling.

CASS
Nem! Nem!

End music

Iain Davis gets a call from his ex-girlfriend:

INT COFFEE SHOP. DAY

DAVIS DE BOER, a tall, thin late twenties looking chap, leans
forward on the table of a busy, downtown coffee shop. Across
from him sits PORTIA MICHEALS, a beautiful young woman who
looks roughly the same age as Davis. She has her arms
crossed, leaning far back in her chair and is looking out the
window.

DAVIS
I was surprised you called.

PORTIA
You were?

DAVIS
I thought - I mean it was a
pleasant surprise. I'd given up -

PORTIA
Given up what?

DAVIS
I'd ... what are you having?

PORTIA
I'm not hungry.

DAVIS
You used to love the coffee here.

PORTIA
When did we come here?

DAVIS
We always came here. That first
night? Remember. Our legs touched
under the table.

PORTIA
You were trying to feel me up.

DAVIS
No I wasn't. Not intentionally.

PORTIA
I'm not having anything. I just
wanted to tell you -

DAVIS
- remember your friend. What's his
name. He used to work here.

PORTIA
What friend?

DAVIS
I can't remember his name. He was
an actor, I think. Goatee.

Portia shifts in her chair.

PORTIA
It doesn't matter.

DAVIS
I remember a lot of things. I've
never forgotten you. And when you
called. Remember our diner at ...
I'd been thinking of calling you.

PORTIA
Why?

DAVIS
I was cleaning out my room the
other day.

PORTIA
You ever get a door?

DAVIS
That's one thick curtain.

PORTIA
Have you washed it at least?

DAVIS
I was cleaning my room and I found
this photograph. Of us. At the jazz
festival. At the harbour. Remember.

PORTIA
Yes.

DAVIS
They were happy times, weren't
they?

PORTIA
Yeah. But they ... I knew this was
going to be hard. You haven't
changed. You're still the same old -

DAVIS
What?

PORTIA
Look I called you as a courtesy. I
called you because I thought I owed
you -

DAVIS
-what? You don't owe me anything.

PORTIA
I thought I owed you a warning.

DAVIS
Warning? I'm fine. I mean I haven't
been checked but I - I didn't give
you something, did I?

PORTIA
My fucking stars ...

DAVIS
You didn't... I've been fine.
Really ... who have you -

PORTIA
What did you think this was all
about?

DAVIS
I hoped that we'd ... that you'd
... that you wanted to get back
together.

Portia looks at him in amazement.

DAVIS (CONT'D)
What?

PORTIA
What the hell would give you that
idea?

DAVIS
I thought when you called. You
haven't been around for awhile.
Maybe you had time to think. You
had second thoughts.

PORTIA
Second thoughts? Where were you
when we broke up? Do you remember
anything I said? Anything I told
you? Was I speaking Chinese? Was
your head so far up your own ass
that - I wish I could say this
surprises me. I really do.

DAVIS
Why did you call?

PORTIA
To warn you. To give you a heads
up. Just in case you hear things.
You probably wont even see it but I
thought I owed you that.

DAVIS
I really thought there was a
chance.

PORTIA
Look I'm sorry. If I had any idea
that you would have thought
something like this.
(pause)
I'm going to be on TV.

DAVIS
That's great.

PORTIA
It's like a game show only -

DAVIS
Wow. What channel? When?

PORTIA
No. No. You can't. You wouldn't
watch this stuff anyway. It's one
of those Reality TV Shows. You
don't watch them. You shouldn't
watch this.

DAVIS
Which one?

PORTIA
It hasn't aired yet. We've shot it
all. It airs soon.
But I didn't want you to hear
things. It's only a TV show.

DAVIS
I want to see it. I think that's
great.

PORTIA
Why would you?

DAVIS
Because you're on it.

PORTIA
Please don't watch. i shouldn't
even be talking about it.

DAVIS
Why?

PORTIA
You idiot. I'm telling you - why
don't you ever listen. You never
listened. I've warned you. That's
all I can do. It's just a stupid TV
show.

Portia picks up her bag and throws it over her shoulder. She
takes a step and stops.

PORTIA (CONT'D)
It wasn't this cafe. It was the one
across the street.

DAVIS
Stay, for some ...

Davis watches Portia leave. He turns in his chair and stares
out the window. His coffee sits before him on the table.
Untouched.

On a chair at the table beside him sits a newspaper. He
reaches over and takes it. He flips to the back page and
looks at the TV listings. He runs his finger down the column
where it reads: 8PM LOVE PATROL